Tag Archive | "During"

5 Ways to Keep Sane During Wedding Planning

You haven’t even been engaged for very long and you already feel your patience beginning to fray with this whole wedding planning thing.  You want to enjoy the planning process, but you find yourself overwhelmed with ideas, selecting vendors, and trying to put this event together.  Here are 5 ways to maintain your sanity while […]
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When a Friendship Ends During Wedding Planning

When a Friendship Ends During Wedding Planning

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One of the most common questions we receive from brides is what to do about a friendship that has fallen apart with someone in the wedding party. It’s one of the many reasons we advise waiting until closer to the wedding during a long engagement to select your bridesmaids.  There is so much change in your twenties with your careers, relationships, even geography.  It’s natural that people grow apart, and that it’s painful when they do.  During your engagement, emotions can seem heightened (as when you experience any type of change) so the stress over that relationship ending is even sharper.

First, let’s start off with this situation from an etiquette perspective.  It’s considered rude to “un-invite” a member of the wedding party, just as it is for a member of the wedding party to withdraw.  Not only is it a faux pas, it’s also a relationship-ender.  Few friendships can recover from this sort of thing.  So, before you are ready to drop the guillotine, take time to assess  and weigh the gravity of the situation.  A difference of opinion or the inability for a bridesmaid to attend a bridal shower is probably an insufficient reason to take such a drastic step.  Work around the problem and hope that your relationship will repair itself in the process.

However, sometimes the issue is just too severe.  If the very presence of your friend sets your teeth on edge, if you are both unable to even enjoy each other’s company at all, then it might be time to commit an etiquette “sin” for the sake of all involved.

Whether you decide to move forward or cut ties, give yourself a break. The loss of a friendship, as much as we might hate to admit it, often feels akin to a break-up.  Take a couple days to grieve the end of a relationship that meant so much to you, and then move on.  You have a lot of positive to focus on right now!

Photography   |    J. Woodbery Photography

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3 Ways to Keep Your Relationship On Track During Wedding Planning

3 Ways to Keep Your Relationship On Track During Wedding Planning

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Engagements aren’t just a time to plan a wedding, they are also a phase to help you transition into a life together. Make sure that you aren’t neglecting each other or what you value most for the sake of organizing an event. Your wedding is going to be amazing. You’ve put in the time to ensure that your event will stay on budget and fit your style.  So, make sure to put romance and communication at the top of your to do list!

Prioritize time for each other.

Bust out your calendars and schedule date nights. These nights don’t have to be fancy or expensive. You can spend them at home watching movies or cooking dinner. But it’s important that the two of you continue to talk about your lives so that you don’t lose touch.

Attend important life events together. He’s finally done with grad school? Throw a party!  You’re receiving a promotion? Celebrate the occasion! Your wedding is not the only event to celebrate. When something outside the wedding sphere occurs during your engagement, make sure it gets the attention it deserves.

Continue to build the friendships around you. Often the community around you can play a crucial and positive role in your marriage. Make sure not to sacrifice buddy time.

Invest in premarital counseling or some other communication skill-builder.

Premarital counseling is no longer just a religious activity or requirement from a local pastor to officiate your ceremony. All couples can benefit from this process which is designed to help improve your communication skills, address potential pitfalls, and help support you through this stressful time. Of course, this aids you in navigating the day-to-day, but it also helps for those worse case scenarios, such as loss of a job or death of a loved one.  You will utilize what you learn in counseling for the rest of your lives.

Pick your battles wisely.

Your future mother-in-law is driving you cra-zazy. She won’t stop dropping hints about how she’d really love for her cousin to sing at the reception, and you aren’t interested. When you talk to your fiance, make sure that you make it about the wedding, and not about the relative. Insulting his family isn’t going to improve your relationship. It’s going to cause discord during a time when no one needs the extra drama. Make sure not to mention every single time you are annoyed by his family and friends, and when you do, express it in a way that doesn’t make him take sides.  If he is struggling to deal with your family, ask him to approach it in a similar way.

Photography by   |   Let’s Frolic Together

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